In the years since becoming a mom, my mom friends have been my life jacket when I could barely stay afloat. Of course, I love all my friends, parents or not. But I am particularly grateful for mom friends in these early years of motherhood, as we are in the trenches together. They get how overwhelming it all is — especially when you add in some postpartum hormones! Moms are used to juggling a lot, and they are used to being selfless, so they are the first to find a way to be there for me when I need it most. They know exactly what I need because they need it too. They saved my sanity when I’ve been at the end of my rope.
To my mom friends,
When I don’t return phone calls, you continue to reach out. You understand this time with multiple young babies and the necessary priority shift in my life, so I don’t have to explain or apologize. Thank you.
When I returned to work after my first baby, you helped me navigate pumping schedules and supply dips. You also let me cry to you every day for a month, as I adjusted back to work. Thank you.
When I had my third baby, you had a local restaurant delivery dinner for us. You did this all from 2,000 miles away. Thank you.
When a stranger asks if I’m pregnant and I’m actually several months postpartum, you tell me about all the times someone asked you the same thing. Thank you.
When you come to meet my newborn, you go straight for the sink and wash your hands. You understand the fears of a new mom with postpartum hormones and you don’t put me in the position to have to ask you to wash your hands. Thank you.
When my babysitter canceled, you canceled our fancy dinner reservation and brought takeout to our house. You played with my kids and helped with bedtime. Thank you.
When I have to say no to fun kid-free plans, you understand completely. You also have to limit time away from the kids because babysitters are expensive! Thank you.
When I text you at 3am because my newborn is up for the fifth time, you text me right back because you just got your toddler back to bed after a nightmare. Thank you.
When I bail last minute because I’m too tired, you understand the level of bone-deep exhaustion I am feeling. You know that I need more than just a nap. I need a week in a hotel room. Alone. You get it. Thank you.
When I had my second and third babies, you checked in almost every day. A quick phone call on your way to work or a text at lunch, you just wanted to check in on how I was handling the adjustment on that particular day. You understood that every day is so different. You know that one of those calls or texts may just be the support I need on the days I feel that I’m drowning. Thank you.
When I cried on the phone to you about how hard this is, you booked a plane ticket and came to help me out the following week. Thank you.
When I had my third baby, instead of a more traditional new baby gift, you had dinner delivered and sent me a spa gift card. Thank you.
When you come over, you don’t judge the fact that my house looks like a tornado came through. Instead, you put away some of the kids’ toys as you hold my baby and we chat. Thank you.
When I express frustration with my husband, you don’t judge me or him or our marriage. You know how difficult it is on a relationship with young children. You listen, commiserate and tell me how you often feel the exact same way. Thank you.
When I had a baby, I was confident that I was doing well emotionally. You still sent a card with the most loving note to remind me that you are there for me. You knew that I would inevitably go through some emotional roller coasters. Knowing I had you for support, helped me when I struggled later. Thank you.
When I forget your birthday, you are not offended. You understand how all-consuming it is and how long it takes the brain to function properly again. Thank you.
When I tell you how my baby still won’t sleep, you don’t assume there is something wrong with my parenting. You understand that every baby is so different. You tell me what helped with each of your babies, and we commiserate over sleep deprivation over a bottle of wine. Thank you.
When our families get together, you insist on holding my baby. Sure you want your baby fix since your youngest is a toddler, but you also know that I could use a break from having a baby in my arms. Thank you.
When I am struggling with anything related to parenthood (breastfeeding, sleep-deprivation, potty training, nap transitions, new daycare, etc.), you are so supportive. You have inevitably been through something similar so you either have fantastic advice, or you offer me a reassuring hug. Thank you.